Monday, April 11, 2016

April 11, 2016 Writer's Digest april PAD Challenge 2016/Defense / Defense II


you said i did it         didn't say exactly                  what it was that i did

said i was disagreeable    i was not aware               i am sorry

i did everything you wanted    trailed along            just to be with you

when the bomb exploded   you were right in there     enumerating my faults

resentments you held against me for years              i am so sorry

i was sorry then          am sorry now                       will always be sorry

you demanded i talk with her      i asked if we could talk later

                                                                                when we were not upset

that only upset you more        i thought if i didn't engage      it would not escalate

i am sorry                   i didn't know                         you have always been first

in my life                    i thought i showed it             but obviously

i failed you        you spoke of something                  that happened nine years ago

i didn't recognize your version    didn't recognize your words               i am sorry

i remembered it differently            it is hard to hold yourself responsible 

                                                                                   when you don't know

your intentions are twisted       beyond recognition       but I will accept all responsibility

though i have no idea               what to call them     how to name what you think i did

now it is all so complex       do not know how to resolve it      i can only say i am sorry

sorry for everything you think i have done                               you have made me your

whipping boy                       you blame me               for all that has gone wrong

with all my might                 i try to see as you see             try to draw a clear picture

you attack me                  where i am most venerable                  you play to win

no holds barred                no boundaries                            it has always been your way

April 11, 2016


Defense II

i try again to say             what i really have no words for          someone was offended

i was offended                two people dumped their shit             emptied their grey water

it was dumped on me      i retreated within myself                    still the shit hit the fan

all were hit                      without discrimination                       and no one was spared

April 11, 2016 


Sherry Blue Sky said...

You make a powerful effort to understand, and I feel the confusion, since the other's perception seems skewed. I have been in this situation, where the other has it wrong but is certain she is right. It is not a fun place to be. You have expressed this so well.

R.K. Garon said...

Geesh, I guess the shit did hit the fan... :-(

Jae Rose said...

When there is a clash sometimes it feels impossible to create harmony again..we don't know the true anger..the true cause..sometimes perhaps it is love itself that makes us angry..i think dumping shit serves a purpose..eventually i hope i hope we can move on from that stalemate

Carrie Van Horn said...

When there are differences between two, it can be hard to iron them out have captured that perfectly here Annell!