A Historic Poem
you came        we
talked         but still so much was left unsaid
                          i guess i thought
you knew              you asked about me
i came here  when
you died                           i lived until i could live again
i rented a house on
half moon        this house was for sale                  i bought it
i came here
because              my gallery was here                   my dealer was here
i came here                  to morn
your loss                                    to learn my new life
the years
passed          there were money problems             everything was in a hairball
one day became
another         at first i did not realize          it was the far side of the world
a good place to
work              i was aware                                  i was not too connected
to this place                  but
soon enough  my roots grew                           i buried my heart
in the desert                 it
has become my home           people have come and gone in my life
some have stayed             i
have guarded my privacy                        then you died last year
i have tried to
remain up right                      i am trying to accept your loss from my life  
                         some days is it
more difficult
i  remain with the
world of trees & clouds & birds           with the flow of the world
i know what I
know           there is much i do not know                    i try to accept change
i look at nature             it
looks back at me                i am sad                 nature is sad
because i am part of
nature                           i try to see through the illusions of my past
you asked  why does
the artist continue                       i replied it is who he is  &
it is all he can
do                                         the artist believes what he does is important
                        the world needs him
the artist is like
the monk        who preys everyday      he believes what he does is important
                        the world needs him
April 23, 2015 
Note:  I have tried
to write honestly about the last 20 years of my life.  I want you to
know. 
 
 
2 comments:
This is a deep read, Annell. Thanks for going so deep and trusting us who read it. I can feel the big losses, feel how the desert slowly healed you from the first. I most love "i remain with the world of trees & clouds & birds / with the flow of the world / " The one constant. I am grateful you have the desert and Taos Mountain. When one is sad, the desert must be a good place to be. I also love your description of being an artist. The work IS important. I like the comparison to a monk that prays. It is very much an inner discipline like prayer, isnt it? This poem wowed me. You are so present in every word.
wow.... nice one
www.mavinmis.com
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