Sunday, July 4, 2010

Sunday Morning July 4, 2010

I have been at my desk all morning, trying to clear the clutter. I did get to paint for a little while yesterday, and hope to again today. As soon as I find the wooden top of my desk, and get all unfinished business cleared away. It is order that I seek, how can I go forward with all this clutter? I feel a little bit like Alice, lost in the rabbit hole, so much to do, so much to do....or is it the Mad Hatter?

I have a collection of my own little thoughts. I often write down my thoughts when I am working to express what I am feeling or thinking in the moment.

Space broken freely,
Frees the view in front of me,
Frees the view I do not see,
Frees the memory locked up tight inside of me.

I am working again with oil. Since it is so dry in New Mexico the oil usually sets up over night. I haven't worked in oil for some time. I love working in gouache for so many reasons; the paint is so beautiful, it dries quickly, it isn't too messy, and when you do get it on your clothes it will wash out. I am afraid when I work in oils, I am messy, it gets on my hands and I then take it everywhere I go, and leave my trail behind carefully marked with the oil paint from my fingers. I really try to be careful, but if you will follow the carefully marked trail you will find me.

I plan to celebrate this 4th of July, dinner with friends, and watching the fireworks put on by our town of Taos. They are usually quite beautiful. I feel a tightening in my stomach, because of the destruction in the Gulf, and I know all,-- human, animal and plant life,-- that live on the Gulf, are not celebrating as their lives are destroyed. And it will never be the same. I spent so much of my life on the Gulf Coast and love it so, I cannot help but grieve. And now we have only to wait, to see if that oil will ever stop, and then the clean up...I fear this destruction will be felt for the the rest of recorded time.

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